Pesto Rice & Chunks of meat

so, i made another creation…
i was flying by the seat of my pants ((seriously… what does that even mean?!?!?!))
and hoping to god it came out ok, cuz we’d ordered pizza the night before, and i didn’t want to have to order something again… haha!!
and it did!!! i was pleasantly surprised!! even husband and m/i/l liked it… yay!!
so.
i cooked up some jasmine rice.
- ya know … 1 1/2 cups chicken broth and 1 cup rice… bring it to a boil, and then lower heat and simmer for 20 minutes
make some pesto while that’s simmering…
i threw the following in my little food processor (my little one!!!)
a big bunch of basil
2 tbsp minced garlic
2 tbsp olive oil
1 tbsp sour cream
salt & pepper to taste

you can probably follow whatever pesto recipe you like… i found one and tweaked it — cuz —–duh!! that’s what i do!

for the “chunks of meat”
i would maaaayyyybbbbeeeee call these meatballs… but… that just didn’t sound right… altho — chunks of meat doesn’t sound good either… and i probably would crumble it up instead of making meatballs if i were to make it again.
but — i used some lamb burgers that i got from the farmers market… they were a mixture of ground lamb and ground bacon. . . i wasn’t going to try these… i really wasn’t… and i was kind of upset b/c husband said he hated lamb … AFTER… i bought them… his mom said he’d love it… haha!!!
he said it’s too gamey…
but, anyways
i got 2 hamburger patties, and just tore those apart and rolled them into balls… like i said, i’d just crumble it up and brown it next time (if there IS a next time)
you can probably use hamburger, or ground turkey or ground chicken…
i think the little balls tho gives it character… so … hmm… maybe i won’t just crumble it…
anyways i took all those little balls, threw in a tablespoon of olive oil, altho, i probably didn’t even need that… and i cooked those babies up…
the rice was done, i threw in the pesto and mixed it around, and then threw that into the mix with the meatballs…
and serve.
nomz. it was actually really good.
– dude… i ate red meat!! wait… is lamb red meat?!?! whatever — i ate something besides chicken!!!! holy whoa… the world is ending!
haha… just kidding. . .
anyways… husband said that it was really good and he couldn’t tell it was lamb… he said probably cutting it with the bacon tempered the gamey-ness out of it…
and m/i/l liked it.. .
so yay! success!!!
but, no pics… oops… it went in my belly much too quickly for that…
HAHA

Bleed

Cut to make the pain go away
Bleed it out.
Too afraid to actually draw the blood.
The blood that could make it better
Let the hurt flow away
Superficial cuts
Do nothing except remind me
Maybe I’m supposed to just hurt

snickelfritz

so, when i was in my hometown… – note that — my hometown, not home…
let me explain something here before i go into this blog detail.
i grew up… well.
i was in the kc area (an hour south) until the summer of my 7th grade year…
then we moved to the STL area … i lived there until 2009. Jan 1 to be exact.
and then i moved to florida.
i have NEVER felt more at home than i did in florida.
it’s amazing.
and then, i met my husband… so… i feel like it’s where we belong.
it’s my home. it’s OUR home.
BUT.
i do have a ton of friends in stl … of course. i was there for over half of my life.
(ok right at half of my life) … well. . . until i moved to florida. i don’t know.
how old is a person in 7th grade… ?? whatever. til i was 29…(*right* before i turned 30)
ok. anyways, i digress.

so. anyways.
although the reason for my visit back to stl was a sad reason, i did get to see several friends…
including 2 of my best friends.
E & L
(not at the same time)
i was kinda sad not to get to see J… but she had already made plans… and — it was kind of last minute… so…*shrug*
i ALSO got to see a couple of my high school besties!!
it was great to be able to catch up with everyone.
with L, we discussed her upcoming nuptials… for which i’m super excited for her!!
with E, i met her youngest … who is going to be 2… and let me tell you what happened…
i pulled up to her mom’s house – kind of by surprise… and her 2 kids were at the top of the driveway, and i walked into the driveway, and
her little boy (youngest, who i’d never met) just walks right up to me arms open.
now, he is just adorable. i don’t like kids — but… her kids are seriously the cutest blondest little things in the world
SO ADORABLE!!!!!!
and i’d met her oldest (who will be 4 soon? or just turned 4? ) before… and of course she doesn’t remember me…
but, her little boy decided i was the greatest fun in the world and just kept running up to me and all that stuff.
apparently — he doesn’t do that…
she was shocked…
but, i got to catch up with her… not that i need much catching up — cuz we talk all the time… but she did offer me support on the subject of dealing with my family… and it was just so great to see her in person, instead of texting or emailing…
and then we went to the bowling alley to meet up with the high school girls… we tried to get more people involved, but lack of numbers, and last minute planning… well… *shrug* 2 of them were there, which is just fine… one of them – Ji – was the first person to befriend me when i started 8th grade in the area… and the other – Je – just became a good friend through the years… so i hung out with those two & E and Je’s baby…
yea — i know… babies…me??? who’d'a’thunk it… {is that how you spell that??}
but… i got to hand them back, so all is good
and i also got to spend some time with my cousin T.
i know i mentioned that in my previous post, but… i’m very happy for her and her new happiness with her new man…
and then i got to do lunch with E before i left… and omg — if you’re in the o’fallon mo area — try rendezvous wine bar.. because it was DELICIOUS!!!!

so… i totally miss my friends… all the time.. .but i’m so happy i was able to see some of them.

<3

there’s this thing that happens

there’s this thing that happens when you find out something that has been going on for a very long time, and you were completely unaware…

it’s kind of bizarre…

but i’m not really going to go into much detail, only that i found out something over the past week that i had no idea existed…

and in turn, kind of ‘gained’ a new family… or something to that effect.

i also reconnected with an aunt that i hadn’t seen in YEARS AND YEARS AND YEARS…

and – that was AWESOME…

my cousin was also super amazing in letting me stay with her and her man… and i’m SO happy for her that she’s happy, and he’s a genuinely good guy!! yay!!!

 

i also… gained 2 pounds while i was away… which –  i know, i know — 2 pounds… *gasp*

but.

i was only 2 pounds away from my goal…

and now i’m not…

and i was feeling thin and feeling better about my body… and now i’m not…

ugh.

gross…

i wish i could go into more detail about the first part of this post… but i haven’t decided on letting all those skeletons out… and … while i don’t care if i piss SOME people off… i do care if i piss others off…

 

RIP Charles Brinker

i’ll be the first to admit, i don’t have a great relationship with my family.

i don’t keep in contact with them as much as i probably should…

even the ones that i actually have a good relationship with…

and i love my remaining grandparents, and i don’t call them as often as i should… and i only send my love to my grandfather via my aunt…

until today.

because today. . . i found out that my oak tree of a grandfather… the strongest, most stubborn man i’ve ever known passed away…

and i feel horrible… cuz i never took the time to make a simple phone call… ask him how he was… and i always thought i could…

i mean … honestly… i send my grandmother little cards every so often… i don’t call — cuz i don’t like talking on the phone so much… but… i never sent one to him, b/c he’s a guy — and you don’t normally do that for guys…

i should have…

and when i got the message from my mother to call home, i knew something was wrong.

i just kinda figured it was my grandma… i messaged my husband and told him i’d probably need to go to STL this week b/c something was wrong, and it was probably my grandmother… but then my mom called, and … my jaw dropped when she told me…

i even told her that i expected it to be grandma…

all i feel is sadness and regret right now…

i just can’t imagine this man gone…

he was … in my mind… powerful and strong… he had gotten hurt recently but was recovering and doing well…

i mean, of course — you can’t keep him down… he’s like an oak tree…

except … now he’s not…

Rest In Peace grandpa… I love you… i’m sorry that i never took the time to tell you.

 

on: the passing of friendships

so, there is that saying… every person comes in your life for a reason or a season… or — however it goes…

and… it’s true… and it sucks… you expect friends, especially good friends to last a lifetime…

and then they don’t… and it sucks…

did i mention — that it sucks??

and you do everything you can to try to revive the relationship… be it with a friend or a family member or whatever…

but … whatever it is you try… it ends… you lose that friend… that relationship and . . .

honestly i thought i would be more eloquent on this subject — it has happened to me so many times, and each time it happens, it doesn’t get any easier…

i lose a person that i trusted, and who knows plenty of information about me… and … it makes it so hard for me to trust anyone… cuz.. well, why — if i’m going to lose them and possibly risk compromising information being put out there if they decide that they want to end things badly…

but most times, it doesn’t end badly, it just ends.

time separates friends…

distance separates friends

and people just drift apart.

life happens… and things don’t stay the same…

and the differences make you a different person, and those differences are the seas that separate you . . .

it makes me sad sometimes, because it’s a heavy loss in some cases, in some cases a person might be relieved, but … i just feel sad when i lose a friend…

and being in the navy, i meet more people than the average person that isn’t in the service…

and i make friends with some of those people, become closer to some than others… and then… people get orders, people get out… things happen, people have kids and … well, i don’t want kids, and that causes a lack of time spent together… and another friendship down the drain…

 

 

so… then…

again, more of nothing, but i need somewhere to share my goals and rants and whatnot- so my fellow wordpressians you fit that bill. i know that i have a lot of new readers, and for that i thank you– and you’re thinking, um, why did i choose to follow this crazy girl’s blog? she doesn’t ever blog about anything important… it’s just a bunch of useless rambling, and yes, you’re right. this is my place to ramble on incessantly about anything i want.
but -
however it is that people find me – they do, and they *gasp* follow my blog… wow…
crazy
husband thinks it’s ridiculous that i post on here… and he thinks no one pays attention to it anyways,,, i like to think that they do…
altho i am kind of disappointed that my last two recipes don’t have ANY likes…
that makes me sad b/c they were DELICIOUS.

moving on then.

my last workout, which unfortunately was monday. so at the beginning of the week, and i want to be going every day… but work problems prevented working out on tuesday and exhaustion and intense leg pain prevented it the rest of the week… oh. yeah – anyways – i posted about the workout it was great, my legs were KILLING me for 3 days… which i guess is good right?
well, tonight i did my cardio/warmup and went up to do my routine … and i added to it.. i added 20 bicycle, and increased the ‘bend-downs’ to 20, and added 20 squats… oh, and 20 bridges…(not sure that’s what they are called)… well, i got through two sets of these… and on my last 2 lunges my legs just gave out… but i powered through to do my squats, they just weren’t the right form all the way through, but then… i just couldn’t do anymore… so i went and ran a quarter mile and then stretched out in the sauna… i was so mad at myself disappointed that i couldn’t finish the 3rd set… but at the same time, i also had to leave soon anyways… so… i’ll try again tomorrow night… hopefully i can go tomorrow (this) morning and get my prt practice in..

speaking of prt practice. i had a dream last night that i was doing my prt and i ran my mile and a half in 12:30 – which i know isn’t amazingly fast like all you super runners,  but hey – it’s good for me, by a long shot… that’s like an excellent high for me! or maybe outstanding … i don’t know off the top of my head… anyways, the people running it said it was too fast, and didn’t believe that i did that… so they told me i had to practice for it and take it again at a later date.

so i started practicing with some random people (that i know, just not going to name in blog) and the first part i was practicing outside… and i just knew that the track we were on wasn’t a mile and a half, but the guy was only making me go around once, and then i moved to inside and it was another person, and still only making me go around this track once, and it was even smaller !! but my times were like 1/2 the time for the prt… it was just crazy, and then — then!!! my dream completely changed, and i was swimming in the ocean with a girl i know, and i could see the ships and the submarines, and i was thinking about bringing husband so he could see it, then all of  a sudden there was a shark near me… and i tried not to panic, but i was not doing very well in that, and the girl i was with pointed to a rocky island and told me to be careful cuz there was another shark on the other side, and i started swimming for it, but a little fish bit my toe, and i had to wake up b/c i didn’t want to get eaten… and seeing as i was now bleeding, i knew that it was going to happen…

yeah strange right??

a couple more random things, and i will come to a close, i promise.

random thing 1. i weighed myself this morning, and i’m only TWO pounds away from my goal weight.

now, my goal weight and my ideal weight are two totally different numbers, and i think i’m doing pretty well to get where i am…

i’ve been trying to eat very healthy and very small portions (compared to today’s mammoth portions that exist) but i can’t keep away from sugar…. namely chocolate…but sometimes other random candy… altho — if i do indulge in chocolate, it’s always dark chocolate. . . which is so much better for you than milk chocolate

so hopefully i can keep on my gym kick, and get to where i want to be…

random thing 2. this bit of news will delight my husband’s best friend, even tho i’m SURE he doesn’t even give a second glance to the fact that i have a blog, so he’ll never know til i tell him… haha… anyways, i have decided… that i’m going to grow my hair out… right now i’m sick of not being able to find a decent hair stylist that will cut it in a flattering way that will last for longer than 2 weeks… i know that short hair grows out quickly and mine grows even more quickly, but i had a stylist in st louis that did amazing things with my hair !!! and i could go two months or MORE without a hair cut and without it looking ridiculous. as it looks now…

so i guess i’ll go in for one more haircut and tell my stylist that i’m going to grow it out and hopefully she or hell — he… can help me out…

so… that’s all i have to say for now…

who knows i  might post something else before the end of the night… it’s only 1230 and i’m here for another 7 hours…

wooooo

yay nights…

more of nothing

so, i did my workout last night, and i felt very good about it.
i wanted so badly to go to the gym again this morning, but… by the time i left work it was after 10 am
i got home at almost 11.
i was EXHAUSTED to say the least.
all i could do was pass out.. i couldn’t even really eat… and i was pretty hungry… but was way too exhausted to eat. . .
so i passed out.
went to sleep at 11… and woke up randomly throughout the day, but actually woke up at 5 pm.
i checked my email… and happened to see one from my bank saying that they noticed some irregular activity on my debit card.
wha!??!?!
so i logged into my bank account and holy hell!!! someone had racked up over $500 worth of charges.
IN CALIFORNIA.
i’m sorry… you may not know this — but i’m definitely NOT in california.
i’m on the east coast…
annnnd i definitely didn’t spend $500 today in over 20 transactions.
at the WIERDEST places.!!!
O’Reilly’s Auto Parts
The 99¢ Store
Albertson’s
and Food4Less

uhh??
so, i called the bank immediately and went over it all…
i am kind of torn — i put money into the account yesterday from another account, and i’m thinking that if i hadn’t put it there – i wouldn’t have this inconvenience right now, but then again, my account would be negative, b/c they’d have drained it in the first few minutes…at least now – i can pay something if i need to… and husband gets paid today, so we aren’t broke or anything… but — it’s just inconvenient…
*shrug*
so i gotta wait until the transactions are actually posted to my account before they refund the money… but i am pretty certain i’m going to have to fill out 25 different forms b/c the last time this happened, i had to fill out paperwork… and it was only one transaction…
but seriously this is always happening to me…
i don’t think i’m careless about my information… i only went to the gas station last night, however, i did sign up for upromise yesterday… i know that’s not a scam… but … did my information get sold from that site??
and along that note -
my email is always getting hacked, when i moved my husband from florida to chicago – my account got hacked, and i had to change my address, which was fine, i had been needing to change it for awhile anyways b/c it was my maiden name still… but, i’ve had to change my password a bunch of times, and it keeps getting sold to 3rd parties – and i’m constantly getting emails and even phone calls for payday loans and all sorts of crap…
it’s just so aggravating…

next rant.
i am really feeling not well right now.
it started out with feeling dizzy and my ears feeling like they needed to pop… i was kind of feeling hungry for a little while.. .and now i’m just feeling ill.
my head hurts, my stomach hurts, and . . . i just generally feel unwell…
i guess i’m just tired…
however, i slept pretty well today i think… i didn’t even take my medicine this morning TO help me sleep…
i did however take some medicine tonight, and i’m wondering if that’s why i don’t feel well…
UGH ANNOYING…

running… navy style.

so, in my gym time tonight,
i made a decision.
as it’s nights, and i prefer/wish/like to do 2 works outs per shift (one at the beginning and one at the end) i decided that my second workout of the shift and the times that i happen to get to the gym/workout on my off days i’m going to do PRT practice.
our PRT schedule starts 29April and i want to get a super high score.
for those that don’t know – PRT is physical readiness test…
we get scored in our ability to do pushups, situps, and running the mile and a half…
my last one i didn’t do as well as i’d wanted…
and i also did it on the bike. .
my last practice one, i pushed myself super hard, but then almost threw up, so i had to back off a little bit..
and didn’t get as high as i wanted
so, i figure if i start practicing… granted i don’t have much time left… i just realized how late in the month it is… *sigh*
if i take the latest availability – which is may 16, i have 3 weeks to practice…
i’m all over it!!!
like white on rice!!
haha

but, my goal is:
85 situps, 35 pushups, and my mile and a half in 13:30.
i prefer to run outside, i really do — vs the treadmill, but. . . our track is 2 feet wide, and you have a ton of people trying to run at the same time … and it’s just not smooth and even and flat… so, it’s kind of unsafe… so, rather than — i don’t know – sprain my ankle again, like i did last time – i’ll just run it on the treadmill…
*shrug*
better that than nothin – right?

yeah!
go me!

jdfhvlkdhgk hkahfkah fkjakd hakfha fbalkfh

so.
this is a compilation of a few things.
1. i’m super angry at my command right now.
– i put in a request to go to a certain school when i got here in october.
i finally got orders to go in february, i think… but – they were standby orders
so i was told i would get to go in april.
well. april’s school came – and someone else got to go.
and i asked the person who told me before that i’d be in the next class about it, and got a snotty response from another person in the training department,
and get to work tonight and find out that 3 other people that didn’t put a request in are going to the may class.
EXCUSE ME!?!?~?~?~? ARE YOU KIDDING?!?!?! Oh holy hell i was angry. . . i yelled. quite a bit. and it just so happens that i have a meeting with my chief tomorrow morning and he will DEFINITELY be hearing about it.
2. i finally got to the gym tonight. i did a pretty good workout (i think…) i did, however, forget my boots for my uniform, so i had to cut it short.
i started with about a half hour of cardio … and then did 3 sets of: 20 bicep curls, 10 bend-downs (i made this up), 20 reverse crunches, 20 regular crunches, 20 oblique crunches, 20 standing oblique twists, 20 weighted lunges. i felt that it was a decent work out. however, i just felt fat even while i was doing it…
i don’t get it
3. i’m very proud of my little girl kitten. she had been randomly peeing all over our clothes (mainly don’s) and i took her to the vet b/c i was concerned about her having another bladder infection… dr said it was behavioral… and suggested we get another box and put it somewhere … well, much to our dismay, the only place to put it was in our bathroom… so, now, while we do have litter all over the floor anytime they use it– there has been no more messes!! yay bella!
4. i’m kinda sad that of my last 2 recipe posts, no one liked them… AND… that the last couple questions i had — people liked those posts, but DIDN’T ANSWER THEM!!!… :-\
that kinda defeats the purpose of reading the post, in my mind…
annnyyyywayyys
that’s all i remember for now…