no use for a name.

So have I mentioned how much I hate the weight gain?!?!? Ugh. Seriously a lot. I have been avoiding buying bigger jeans for a long time b/c I just don’t want to own them… but, as it happened, Don and I were going to be gone for the entire weekend, and while I have worn the same pair of jeans all weekend before, I just wasn’t looking forward to doing that this time around. . . especially b/c I had to wash the jeans that fit me and wasn’t 100% certain they’d be dry in time for us leaving on Friday… so I stopped and bought a pair of jeans. I wanted a pair like I had, just bigger, but they didn’t have them in the right length at the first target I looked at. . . so I bought another pair that I was only eh about… and took them home and told Don that I wanted to go to our target and look for the right ones… so I did… and they didn’t have them either, but they did have them in a different wash… so I bought them . . . I was planning on exchanging them… but I couldn’t decide… cuz this wash was super dark… so I took them home, and told Don that he would have to help me decide which ones to keep…. After trying them on, he told me to keep both of them. . . my hope is that I will lose some of this weight I’ve packed on and can return the jeans within the 3 month window… (or exchange…)

I’m hopeful that this happens sooner rather than later. I’m really tired of feeling this way, and I feel like I’m getting bigger instead of smaller… {{this past weekend did NOT help. . . I ate SO much food, and had a LOT of alcohol…yeah… bad news in the diet front — more on that later}} but – it doesn’t make sense to me, b/c I’m infinitely more active than I was before I gained all the weight even… and have been dieting,(most of the time) and WORKING OUT. Granted I don’t get super hard core work outs in, but the fact that I’m doing it in general should be doing SOMETHING for me… ((I thought)) yesterday while at the gym, I got on the treadmill *because oddly enough it actually hurts less than the elliptical* and walked at a 3.5 mile pace on a level 3 incline. And then pushed it up to 3.8, and then higher, and I actually was up to 4.8, for about 45 seconds… a slow jogging pace, but it hurt to bad to continue it… I continued on the treadmill though, just going back down to the 3.5… I did about 15 minutes I think… a mile and a half I do believe… then at physical therapy yesterday afternoon, I was doing the treadmill and worked up quite a sweat… which is confusing to me, b/c during my hour and a half work out in the morning I BARELY broke a sweat, and I even discussed that with GSE2. . . he told me it was my water intake… but, still — it makes me feel like I’m not getting a good workout in, when I think that I am… so, I don’t know… I’m trying not to get discouraged.. I REALLY am… sometimes it’s just difficult.. .

More later, but time to get to the Commissary and take my monkey to the groomer… she’s a bit sheddy right now..


About trozellerosio

I am me. that's really all there is to know. I am still figuring out exactly all that entails, but I think it takes a lifetime to do so...

Posted on March 22, 2011, in Diet and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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