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stress baby

i’ve determined, that since stress is known to make you produce more cortisol and cortisol is found to increase ‘brown belly fat’ – the fat that you gain around your midsection is a stress baby… just like you have food babies?? well… i have a stress baby… and i posted a pic on Facebook and all my friends are like what?!? there’s nothing there and getting upset  with me for complaining about it… but when i look down and see my stomach protruding as much as my boobs do… that’s a problem… so it doesn’t show up on my pic… it’s still there and it’s causing me distress. .  . . hence the juice diet.

although today has been so stressful i’m about to change my juice diet to just wine.

that’s juice.

it’s fruit.

just fermented.

same difference right?? fermentation is better for you right?? see: kombucha.

anyways. whatever.

last night i took the zucchini I had that was about to go bad and the rest of my kale that wouldn’t last much longer and a lemon I happened to have on hand and juiced that… this morning I added it to my breakfast juice/smoothie along with some chia seeds, wheatgrass powder, carrot juice, 1/4 avocado (good fats – ya know?) and 2 tbsp of my greek yogurt.

it’s 1:42 pm … I just ate (drank?) it… that was my breakfast. outside of my coffee.. it was pretty good…

i’ve been adding water to the juices to make them a bit thinner and fill up my mason jars… haha

i didn’t weigh myself yesterday before i started this diet. . . journey… hell? haha

today i just want to eat ALL the bad foods… i’m so stressed.

i used to never be a stress eater… i couldn’t eat if i wasn’t hungry – it made me sick…

age changes things i guess… i don’t like it.

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Glitter herpes

so a couple random things here and there.

i did the whole juicing cleanse and then diet…

i lost a total of 6 pounds depending on the day.

i have two to three pounds left to lose.

i’m still drinking juices, however, i’m incorporating a lot more food into my diet (and sometimes i feel guilty as hell)

i think for the last two or three pounds though, i’m going to to strict juice again…

i just want to lose it and keep it off.

i’m pretty stoked about the weight loss tho.

i last weighed as much as i do now before i went to florida for my vacation in april of 2012. . .

i then gained 7 pounds back b/c we ate like pigs kings we were on vacation (cuz we were) and i had the WORST time getting it back off.

it was such a struggle and i actually only got to my first goal weight once or twice since april… and now i’m two to three pounds away from my dream goal weight…

i’ve been running a lot lately, but honestly , i think i’m getting worse instead of better… Lovely vegan girl and I did a couch to 5k training program and then we started a 10K training program… i feel like i’m regressing instead of progressing though 😦

but i’m registered for my first ever 5k!!! i’m going to run a color run in april!! i’m super excited about it!!

but, i’m sad b/c she’s now getting out, and i’ll have to continue the training alone… it’s such a bummer running alone… ((especially inside!!))

but, i need to maintain my motivation and also get back to regular workouts along with the runs b/c i still need to tone up so that losing the weight i’ve lost actually shows…

i can’t wait to have a toned tummy . . . i know that my legs and booty are more of a problem, but the first thing i see is my stomach . . . and i want it to not be poochy…

i’ve always had a problem with that though… even when i was seeing a personal trainer in st. louis a hundred years ago, my main problem was my stomach . . . the rest of me was smoking hot, but i had a huge issue with my pooch… i felt like it looked like i’d had a child, even though i never had…

((that i’m aware of — i mean i DO have some repressed memories… could i have repressed a whole 9 months?!?!  lol… juuuuuusssssst kidding))

anyways… next subject:

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one of the reasons i’m so sick of the military is b/c i don’t feel like a girl… i can’t do what i want with my hair (color wise) and i can’t have pretty girly nails that i want (other than pink… or beige… (((blah!!))) and . . . i don’t have a first name.

i think i hate that most of all… (well other than the uncomfortable uniforms…)
but, one of the things that i do to help me deal with that is call the girls in my section  by their first names… guys are different, and even in the real world — a lot of them go by their last names…

it’s not like that with girls…

the thing is though… while i call all of them by their first names, i’m still called by my last name…

it makes me sad…

sometimes i just get so shocked when i DO hear my first name…

but… it also makes me feel like i read more into their friendship than they do into mine… if that makes sense… like i consider them more a friend than they consider me…

i don’t know if that’s a valid concern at all… it’s just how i feel…

and i know that no one joins the military to make friends — i’ve said that more than my fair share of times, but … at a certain point you do make friends with the people you work with. . . .

but. . . it is what it is… *sigh*

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so… i have some girls i work with that have baby girls (or one on the way) and one of them has a registry on etsy and there were these cool looking little feetie flower things . . . and they look SO easy to make!! so i ordered some stuff to make them!! i’m excited to get the stuff in… i tried making a flower out of quilting blocks… but i’m not too pleased with how it started to turn out… i haven’t finished it yet… but… i think i need to figure out a different way to do it…

and while i was researching the flowers, i thought about tutus…

and OMG . . . !!! i decided i needed to make the babies at least one…

so my first one – i made for the little one that’s here for her valentine’s day pics!!

it is SUPER cute!! and it didn’t really take all that long… it did however make the most mess ever!!

i used glitter tulle…

and i think there is more glitter on me and the floor and the desk than stayed on the fabric!!

but holy monkeys it is the cutest thing i’ve ever made!!!! and i can’t wait to get a picture of it!!!!!!!!!

i made it at work (i’m productive) so i can’t take a picture of it… but there is glitter EVERYWHERE…

i’m sure the vacuum isn’t going to suck it all up – so our work center supervisor will feel like a princess when she gets to her desk… lol!!!

have i mentioned how adorable this tutu is!?!?!?

so cute!!!!

i got extra tulle, so i’m going to return the two rolls i didn’t need and get some to make a st patrick’s day one for baby on the way –

um. scratch that… we just realized she’s not due til after SPD, soooo… that’s not going to work… mama to be said she thinks she’ll be here early, but i don’t wanna make one that won’t be used and can’t be sold til after the fact…

i’ve got some fourth of july flowers and bands coming to make the headbands and footie things… so i’ll just focus on the tutu for then… that will be fun 🙂 red white and blue! 🙂
and non glitter tulle…

learned my lesson on THAT one!!!

but, if these do become successful, which i already think the tutus are — after just my first one, i’ll probably sell them on etsy! 🙂

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next subject:

housing.

i pay a shit ton of money for rent.

way more than my bah.

and bah went down for this area . . . so even MORE than what bah would be if i hadn’t already  been making what i was… (thankfully they don’t change your rate unless it goes UP)

and i don’t think i’m getting what i pay for…

so, we’re going to look for a house when our lease comes due…

but, i don’t know when to start looking.

our lease expires in october, but i have to give a two month notice if we are leaving…

but what if i find a place and they don’t want to hold it that long??? i can’t pay extra to get out of my lease early,, and i don’t want to pay more for my rent if i have to extend it a month or two… b/c it’s going to go up – that’s a given… ((which i don’t get — here let me reward your loyalty by raising your rent)) but if i only extend it a month or two it’s going to go up by upwards of $200!!! instead of just the $30ish. . .

that’s not ok.

so… i just don’t know when to start looking, and i don’t know if i find a place i like if they will hold it for two months for me… ((or three if i start looking earlier…which is probably necessary))

i could just stay where we are — but it’s so hard to save money when i’m paying so much in rent…

i already pay for ALL my utilities so there won’t be sticker shock in that, but husband says that our electric will probably be a lot more — but i’m hoping that we can become more aware of our usage…

our bill this month was $181!!!!!

we used TWICE the amount of energy this month vs last january…

that is NOT ok.

so, we’re going to try to figure a way to make things better…

maybe this january was colder than last… but — regardless – not ok.

if anyone has any suggestions about any of the housing issues i’ve stated, please bring them on… my biggest concern is the lease issue… finding a place that will either wait for our lease to end… or finding a place at all…

one of my MAJOR concerns is not being able to find a place after giving notice… but i have to give a two month notice… but i really want out … but what if i don’t find a place that meets all of our criteria… and i know i know — you say – change your criteria — but there are some things that we can’t change.

so… *sigh*  i hope it all works out… granted — it’s january… and i don’t have to start worrying hard core until august?? earlier?? who knows…

it stresses me out… i don’t know what to do…

but i did find out that i can use a realtor to find me rentals for free!! i always thought they’d charge, b/c i know they charge commissions on sales… i figured they’d charge something for finding rentals too!!… don’t judge me if you knew this already… i’ve never used one before, so. . . :-p

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moving on.

tomorrow i have labs in the morning for my physical exam.

i tried to explain to my dr that i need to know what time the lab closed b/c i work nights and i can’t really sleep most the day going without food and water and then stop my food and water intake at midnight so that i can do my testing in the morning… obviously she’s not the sharpest crayon in the box, b/c the only thing she told me was the lab opens at 7, don’t drink or eat anything after midnight.

ok. um.

yeah – that’s not what i asked…

but whatever. fine.

I AM SO THIRSTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and — some people say i should be able to drink water, but — her email just says NOTHING to eat or drink after midnight…

ugh!!!!

ok.

yeah.

that’s it.

i think i’m done.

~peace~

so… then…

again, more of nothing, but i need somewhere to share my goals and rants and whatnot- so my fellow wordpressians you fit that bill. i know that i have a lot of new readers, and for that i thank you– and you’re thinking, um, why did i choose to follow this crazy girl’s blog? she doesn’t ever blog about anything important… it’s just a bunch of useless rambling, and yes, you’re right. this is my place to ramble on incessantly about anything i want. 🙂
but –
however it is that people find me – they do, and they *gasp* follow my blog… wow…
crazy
husband thinks it’s ridiculous that i post on here… and he thinks no one pays attention to it anyways,,, i like to think that they do…
altho i am kind of disappointed that my last two recipes don’t have ANY likes…
that makes me sad b/c they were DELICIOUS.

moving on then.

my last workout, which unfortunately was monday. so at the beginning of the week, and i want to be going every day… but work problems prevented working out on tuesday and exhaustion and intense leg pain prevented it the rest of the week… oh. yeah – anyways – i posted about the workout it was great, my legs were KILLING me for 3 days… which i guess is good right?
well, tonight i did my cardio/warmup and went up to do my routine … and i added to it.. i added 20 bicycle, and increased the ‘bend-downs’ to 20, and added 20 squats… oh, and 20 bridges…(not sure that’s what they are called)… well, i got through two sets of these… and on my last 2 lunges my legs just gave out… but i powered through to do my squats, they just weren’t the right form all the way through, but then… i just couldn’t do anymore… so i went and ran a quarter mile and then stretched out in the sauna… i was so mad at myself disappointed that i couldn’t finish the 3rd set… but at the same time, i also had to leave soon anyways… so… i’ll try again tomorrow night… hopefully i can go tomorrow (this) morning and get my prt practice in..

speaking of prt practice. i had a dream last night that i was doing my prt and i ran my mile and a half in 12:30 – which i know isn’t amazingly fast like all you super runners,  but hey – it’s good for me, by a long shot… that’s like an excellent high for me! or maybe outstanding … i don’t know off the top of my head… anyways, the people running it said it was too fast, and didn’t believe that i did that… so they told me i had to practice for it and take it again at a later date.

so i started practicing with some random people (that i know, just not going to name in blog) and the first part i was practicing outside… and i just knew that the track we were on wasn’t a mile and a half, but the guy was only making me go around once, and then i moved to inside and it was another person, and still only making me go around this track once, and it was even smaller !! but my times were like 1/2 the time for the prt… it was just crazy, and then — then!!! my dream completely changed, and i was swimming in the ocean with a girl i know, and i could see the ships and the submarines, and i was thinking about bringing husband so he could see it, then all of  a sudden there was a shark near me… and i tried not to panic, but i was not doing very well in that, and the girl i was with pointed to a rocky island and told me to be careful cuz there was another shark on the other side, and i started swimming for it, but a little fish bit my toe, and i had to wake up b/c i didn’t want to get eaten… and seeing as i was now bleeding, i knew that it was going to happen…

yeah strange right??

a couple more random things, and i will come to a close, i promise.

random thing 1. i weighed myself this morning, and i’m only TWO pounds away from my goal weight.

now, my goal weight and my ideal weight are two totally different numbers, and i think i’m doing pretty well to get where i am…

i’ve been trying to eat very healthy and very small portions (compared to today’s mammoth portions that exist) but i can’t keep away from sugar…. namely chocolate…but sometimes other random candy… altho — if i do indulge in chocolate, it’s always dark chocolate. . . which is so much better for you than milk chocolate 🙂

so hopefully i can keep on my gym kick, and get to where i want to be…

random thing 2. this bit of news will delight my husband’s best friend, even tho i’m SURE he doesn’t even give a second glance to the fact that i have a blog, so he’ll never know til i tell him… haha… anyways, i have decided… that i’m going to grow my hair out… right now i’m sick of not being able to find a decent hair stylist that will cut it in a flattering way that will last for longer than 2 weeks… i know that short hair grows out quickly and mine grows even more quickly, but i had a stylist in st louis that did amazing things with my hair !!! and i could go two months or MORE without a hair cut and without it looking ridiculous. as it looks now…

so i guess i’ll go in for one more haircut and tell my stylist that i’m going to grow it out and hopefully she or hell — he… can help me out…

so… that’s all i have to say for now…

who knows i  might post something else before the end of the night… it’s only 1230 and i’m here for another 7 hours…

wooooo

yay nights…

no use for a name ((a little of this and a little of that))

so,

Christmas is in a few days…

IT’S SO CLOSE!!!

and, we were going to do very little for it this year, b/c of financial insecurity. but, now bear has a job, a good one at that, and we’re supposed to be receiving our remaining move money any minute now…

so, i don’t have to go tiny for christmas. last year we had a great christmas…

but, we kind of have everything we want…

for the most part.

i do know that he wants to finish his motorcycle… and his kayak… i gave him stuff for his birthday to finish his kayak, but due to his sleep schedule being messed up by mine being messed up, that hasn’t gone anywhere… annnnd… the motorcycle was a bit to pricey to finish until he got a job, so now he can do that…

but,

he wants a new bc for diving… that’s $700.

he wants a telescope — which would be cool! but, that’s $700

he wants a suit.. . the cheapest one i would buy for him ((just looking at one site… )) is $500…

um.

wow…

i did figure out some meaningless little thing… i’m not sure he’s gonna like it, and he very well may think it’s absolutely lame… but… *shrug* it’s just something i thought he’d be interested in, and i did get a little jokey gift, cuz i always do that… (i say always like it’s been many many years, and this is our 3rd christmas as a married couple together… our very first Christmas *together* we didn’t do anything for each other. no gifts. we got married the next day… and we went to my aunt’s house in florida for the actual holiday… or possibly christmas eve… not sure. but we had no tree, no gifts, no decorations… we were kind of broke… and the biggest thing was that we got to see each other at all.. and then the next day we were getting married… on the beach… i mean, honestly, what better gift can you have? i got my ring that week, so… even tho we didn’t actually celebrate christmas, it was a good one… we were together… and i hadn’t seen him since August…

our other christmases together as a married couple were good also. he finds gifts that suit me, and i do the same for him…

now, i do feel kind of bad,. b/c we don’t really do a lot in gifts for others… we don’t get much in the way of gifts from other people, and we give to those we get from, mainly his family. . . last year we got his mom tickets to a U2 concert, but we got them way before christmas… and he hadn’t gotten her a gift in a very long time…

but, his brother & sister buy things for us, even tho we don’t want them to. it’s not necessary and we tell them that all the time… b/c we don’t know what to get them!! this year is going to be a lot more difficult, cuz we aren’t there… and we don’t agree with the way things are going… and i know it’s better to give than recieve, but honestly, i don’t think they deserve to get anything… they are SO selfish… and are putting a certain someone through living hell. it’s not fair the way they treat this person, and she would be so much better if they hadn’t guilted her into staying…

UGH.

that’s another subject

and i don’t have a subject for this blog,  but that’s not it.

i think that right now this is just a post for my thoughts…

and it started out as a post about what the hell i’m gonna get husband for christmas!!!!!!!!!!!!

altho i think it might make me sound very selfish..

but, ya know,

to a point i am — i enjoy my husband immensely . . . it saddens me to see people in loveless marriages, and who don’t like to spend time with their spouses and don’t get treated well by their spouses… i will tell you this, my husband spoils me like crazy… i’ve never been treated so well. . .
we do fight… and those fights suck…
but through it all, i love him so unbelievably much… and it drives me CRAZY and makes me mad on top of it when we are fighting, that i can’t hate him… i might wanna punch him in the face, but i still love him… there are just times when i don’t like him… ((when we fight, we fight mean))

and to that end, i want us to enjoy our life. honestly — that’s just one of the myriad of reasons that i don’t want kids. i want to enjoy him. i want to have him to  myself, and it works, cuz he doesn’t want children either… and i know so many people say, well if you don’t want kids, there is no reason to get married, but to you i say – that’s not true.
but, hey – to each their own…

a marriage shows that two people are truly committed to each other, and i know you can be committed to someone without being married – -but — if you don’t have that piece of paper, that ring, all that — what’s really stopping you from just walking away…

granted that makes it sound like a trap, but — that’s not what i’m saying . . .

when you go through the ceremony… you get that certificate, you exchange rings – you are showing the world that this is the person you want to be with . . . that you are willing to traverse this life together with this person, and you are going to work to make that happen.

that  is why it makes me so mad when people just get married for the hell of it. . . . and in the military — for the benefit of it… getting married purely for the benefits makes such a mockery out of marriage.. .it irritates me to no end.

anyways…

take from this what you will… i don’t have any purpose really other than to waste time and put my thoughts out there…

on a plus note– did i mention that bear got a job?? woohoo!!! 🙂

that makes me happy cuz it will make him happy, less stressed, and hopefully get him back on a healthy track!! yay !! 🙂

 

do you ever just wonder?

do you have problems shutting off your brain? making it be quiet? allowing you to relax? maybe to sleep? or focus on the task at hand?

*sigh*

i, unfortunately, have this problem. and it IS  a major problem… it affects my most intimate tasks, and it disallows (yes i made this word up just now because i couldn’t think of the word prevents) me from sleeping…

my current f/b status is: my mind is constantly on. . . always thinking, always wondering…
sometimes it makes life most difficult…

i wonder constantly about stupid random stuff that i really honestly don’t care about.

my mind flashes back to random memories… sometimes at inopportune times… and it annoys the hell out of me.

i think it might be b/c i don’t remember a lot from a certain portion of my life, so the random memories come back to haunt me in flashes…

so i flash back to random events, random people, and i wonder how they are doing, even tho i may not have talked to them in 15 years… and then that makes me think of some other event… or person, or place, or thing… and before i know it i’m lost in a sea of randomness . . .

and then i pull myself back to reality… and i realize i’m clenching my jaw… i don’t know why this happens, the whole clenching of the jaw, but i have to literally tell myself to unclench… and relax my face…

i really … just wish that sometimes i was able to forget it all, and quiet my mind and actually legitimately relax…

did you know — i am unable to relax. i just can’t. it doesn’t work. i have tried it millions of times over the years… and i can’t go without moving… it just doesn’t work well for me…

try having that problem in boot camp…. :-\

what do YOU do to focus your mind on the life at hand…

more than just a task — this life –

i want to focus on NOW. not then… granted then is what made me who i am now, but … i am that person, and i want to just live in the now… and reminisce only when i want to… not when i’m trying to do something else…

cuz really it can be annoying as hell…

so i wanna post a blog

but, unfortunately, i have nothing to say right now.

i could complain about my every increasing weight… but — i’m pretty sure that won’t help me any… i complain about it all the time, in person, to my husband, to my co-workers, and to the few friends i contact…
i shudder everytime i look in the mirror. but i’m dieting, and working out… it’s just not as fast as i want it…

i can do an update… hmmm i’m working 12 hour shifts now.
trying to get 3m qualled (sp?) so i can do something, and impatiently awaiting getting into the indoc that was cancelled, b/c until i go through that i can’t officially start studying for my EIDWS pin. i want to get that before i advance… unfortunately, i’m going to have to start studying for the advancement exam… so it will be a little difficult to study for both and not confuse the hell out of myself…

umm, i’ve been perusing a TON of  blogs lately, i’ve found QUITE a few that i really like…
and then one that my friend started re-posting on…
so here’s a paragraph:
blogs i like. . .
http://usnspartan85.blogspot.com/   – a site from a fellow sailor… she’s very eloquent and super smart
http://thecheekydiva.com/  –  found her today while wandering through wordpress
http://righttobitch.com/  –  found him today while on the cheeky diva’s page
http://singlegirlblogging.com/  – ok, i’m not single. . . not by a long shot — but, i like the way this girl writes

these are just ones i’ve found in the past 24 hours…
oh, there was one from the other day that i found via freshly pressed: http://diaryofasadwidow.wordpress.com/   — i started reading it b/c of the title on freshly pressed – and ended up very teary eyed while at work… kind of embarrassing . . . but, hey it’s whatever…   (((((p.s. — i don’t know the proper protocol for linking a blog… i’m just sharing some that i happened upon…if this happens to be you and you are offended, i apologize, and please share the appropriate way to link))))

i don’t follow blogs, unless i know the person… i feel that it’s kind of intrusive BUT — i wish for more followers on mine… how’s that for a dumb idea…

i also wish i could be freshly pressed…

i read criteria for getting pressed — i don’t want to comply…
you have to link here and there and everywhere… well, honestly folks, i don’t click on those links 9 times out of 10… I don’t like it to change the page i’m on or open another window…

i’m on crack, it’s cool, i know

so there’s a substantial portion of information…

um, what else…

i spent most of one entire work shift (12 hours if you don’t remember) on craftgawker.com  ((ooh look i kind of linked!)) because it’s so interesting to see what other people come up with from within their minds. i have been wanting to make jewelry for a long time now, i’m just not creative enough… well, let me take that back.  i have GREAT ideas in my head… it’s just getting them out of there and actually looking the way i want them to that poses a problem…
kind of like drawing… DUDE let me tell YOU — in my mind, i’m a fantastic artist…
i have always had the dream of being a fashion designer… unfortunately… i can’t draw. worth. shit.

so needless to say, i feel the same way when i have this craft/jewelry idea in my head and … it just never works out.. husband even has laughed at some of the miserable failures that have occurred… and while he IS supportive of what i want to do –  there’s not always a logistic outlet or result for what i create… for instance i made this very cool (in my opinion) wall hanging to hang in our new place … yeah, um, it’s sitting in our spare room along with all the boxes that we have no idea what to do with… uh — not hanging… and i made coasters! they are so cool looking!! but, you can’t really use them, b/c for some reason, they don’t work right — you put your glass on it and it sticks… this does not go well with our new furniture… i don’t want to be the reason of a big dent in our new furniture… so i’m uninspired to create new things… i even made wall hangings back in illinois that i was just not happy with when i was done, but we hung them anyways, buuuut… ended up throwing them away when we moved b/c i wanted to do them better… ((yeah haven’t gotten there yet))     {note: look i linked!! and um, they are supposed to go to a new window, but it ends up changing the window you’re in… sigh}
anyways, i think i might attempt some form of making jewelry during my 12 hour shifts, b/c i’m gonna need a break from studying, and i start overnights soon… oy vey!!!

so, ok i guess i’ve rambled on incessantly enough for one blog…

~peace~

 

tsk tsk i’m not doing what i should be doing!!

so, i move on monday!

i get to see my husband on monday!!

this post should be called the one monday i’ll be thankful for!!!

oh, i also graduate c-school on monday… but — i’ve been done for over a week now anyways… no big deal…

i should be packing, and finishing the two projects that i have to complete so that they are waiting to surprise my husband when we arrive next saturday (or sunday) . . .

buuuut

i’m. not.

i have no self discipline sometimes… i HAVE gotten all my clothes folded… and most of them separated into not taking this back to IL and am taking this back to IL . . . but i’m only going to be there a few days, and i’m pretty sure my taking back pile is too big… ((oops))

but, that isn’t surprising knowing me… i WAYYYY overpacked for coming here in general… just figured what i did pack would make it easier on my husband cuz that means he didn’t have to pack it..

so anyways, now i have to pack it all up… .and i just can’t get motivated to actually do so…

even tho i’m super excited about moving… and finally having our kick ass apartment!! plus, i want to finish the projects so he’s surpised — cuz i think they are cool 🙂

and i hope that he doesn’t think having so many do it yourself projects is hokey… i’m sure he won’t, these are things that just cross my mind… i think that the project i made last week or whenever will go on the mantle . . . and then there are some red vases we have in the bedroom which will probably be relocated on either side of the board…

Inspired by a friend

My love board inspired by a friend who was inspired by pinterest

i took pictures throughout the process of making it with the hopes of uploading a tutorial… but wordpress and i seem to have issues when i want to do something like that…

i tried it before with a stuffed squash recipe… it just didn’t work… i even signed up at blogher and still couldn’t get it done right. it made me sad.. i’m still going to try it though. eventually. maybe.
oh just a random vent – regarding blogs — cuz that’s mostly where my stumbling takes me — i really get annoyed when people ask pertinent questions in a blog’s comments and the writer never responds… really!?!?! that irritates me, b/c you don’t answer it — that probably turns that person off, and they don’t try whatever awesome thing it was that you did/made; and probably don’t wanna read your blog after that b/c they were let down… and if they do answer them via private email — that’s just not fair — b/c what if i, while reading the blog, come up with the same question — wouldn’t it save a lot of time if you answered it in the comments and then everyone who might have that same question is saved! 🙂 yay!

ugh. annoyance.

if anyone ever actually asks me a question in a comment i will answer it!!

 let’s see what else…

i’m so excited to see my husband…

but here’s where the story turns sad…
i haven’t spent time alone with my husband since 1July,
the next day we picked up his brother, he has lived with ‘us’ since then… I say ‘us’ because i haven’t been there since 13July…
he will still be there until 3Oct, then on the 5th – we leave for VA . . .
which is great right?
well, we’re going to be having a roommate for the indefinite future…
I can’t really divulge much details… but it will be better for her … so much better than her life now…
it just means that i won’t be able to live our life how we are accustomed to for awhile… which really just sucks after not seeing him for so long 3 months…
but we are going on a date on monday night after he picks me up from the airport and i’m looking forward to that!! cuz i’m going to be dressed pretty for him, and i told him he had to dress pretty for me… yay!!! i just have to pick out a restaurant between midway and home… i think i found one… i just gotta look it up again… mainly cuz i don’t remember the name of it or anything…

but… i’m going to mess around on the internet a little bit more, or maybe make some lunch… i don’t know, i do know that i probably won’t pack… even tho husband just told me to get on it… oops…

~peace~

so.

there’s been so much stuff going through  my head. but i never have time to just sit down and write… mainly cuz i have VERY limited time at home… and just can’t make the time for this… today, i don’t think i have too much to do, so i will do this, and make the edits that i made and ta-da we’ll have a post. 

i started night school. this means that i have to be on base from noon to whenever i get out of school and am able to leave the base. usually midnight or later. on duty days i go in at noon, and don’t get to leave until after school the NEXT day. . . THAT sucks. i hate it. i am in yeoman training so that i don’t have to deal with that… it REALLY sucks not being able to see Don every day… and i know, i know, some people have to deal with not seeing their spouses/significant others — but my choice was to bring my husband here, while i’m in school, to help strengthen and cultivate our relationship. he is always 15 minutes away, so the fact i don’t actually get to see him bothers me. . .

we went out wednesday before thanksgiving, for the first time in a LONG time, with some people from class and had SO MUCH FUN!! i honestly haven’t had that much fun in a super long time.  since i was in st louis, and even that was shadowed by pain… so, it was a good night.

school is driving me crazy.  it’s just too loud, and i don’t understand why people can’t just be quiet… it really bothers me… and the fact that no one does anything about it bothers me as well… i need to bring in ear plugs i think… but i hate having things in my ears. lol…

i am flip flopping around near the weight i am trying to attain… i thought being a night student would grant me the ability to work out every day!! i was WRONG. we have to muster so often that i don’t have time to get an actually decent work out in. i have to be there at 1 pm and then i can head over, but since i don’t move well in the actual pt gear, i have to take a change of clothes, change, work out, shower, re-dress and be back over at the ship by 230. that’s not enough time. some days it’s not til 330, and i can do it then, but lately i have been training, so i haven’t gotten the chance.  on mondays i now have a meeting at 230 so i can’t go… don says go before i am due on the ship, which i COULLLLDDDDD but, then i’m home for an hour at most… it’s hard enough being home for 2.5 hours (cuz i get up at 9 for around 8 hours of sleep) so, i don’t know. it’s just rough right now… *shrug*

but i did make a plan to cut out soda . . . cuz as a night student trying to stay awake all night, i enlisted in the aid of mountain dew — heavily. . . i’m going to try to not do that… one night down… we’ll see!!!

but, i must get things ready for school. . . oyyy veyyyyy

ninnyhammer

just an odd word. no relevance in this blog at all… i just needed a title. that i hadn’t used before, and unfortunately i’ve used randomnessishly…

anyways. this is just a random post. of all the things i want to say right now, but have no where else to put them.

my husband – he’s amazing.!!!
i have this ipod shuffle that i got from a friend last year before she left for california; and in order for me to have proper headphones for it – -i need an adapter… (cuz i don’t deal with earbuds well. they fall out.) and my adapter has been screwing up for awhile, so i told husband that i need a new mp3 player… oooo pricey… so, i said ya know what i can spend $7 and get a new adapter. case closed.
so i did just that.  got the new adapter in on monday and used it tuesday and it has the same problem that the other one did, it just took a LOT longer for the other one to actually fail. this one failed on the VERY FIRST DAY of use.
BOO!!
i was irritated… i texted husband, he said don’t worry about it… ugh. whatever. i was going to send it back…
husband called me yesterday and asked my opinion on a specific mp3 player… unfortunately i don’t like that one, we got to talking, and it turns out he had purchased that one… but he took it back and bought the one i like, and is sending it to me!! Yay!!! now you may think, what’s the big deal; he’s spending your own money to buy you something. oh contraire my frier  **i don’t know how to spell french words and i’m not going to research it right now** he has his own stash of cash received from working on the house in florida.
woo!!

regarding florida.  he comes home on june 4. 
he leaves again on june 18.  DISLIKE.

 he will be there until july 24. it was july 31 but we have a concert on the 30th so, he will be back for that.

he also — is having me come down for the last week he is there… so i will be in florida july 15-24!!!  {{HOPEFULLY!!!}} i say hopefully b/c i don’t know what’s going on with school and such yet. i hope that IF i am back in school they honor my leave request and let me go… otherwise. i will cry. a. lot.

i have been working out a lot . . . but not as much as i should, but apparently MORE than i technically am supposed to be… according to my physical therapist dr… 😦

all the severe pain i’m getting is normal too according to her, b/c i have been out of commission for so long… yadi yadi yada…

found out tuesday that contrary to what people have been telling me, once i pick up my fit for full paperwork (June2) i WILL have to run and PASS a prt.  i was told i just had to participate in one. no, i have to pass it, or i’m not worldwide assignable and the navy kicks me out. well. crap. i mean i knew i’d have to do one soon, but i didn’t realize it’d be THAT soon, and i’m working on it i REALLY am… and i guess if i can pass low, it’s still a pass. . . but, it just adds more stress to my life… stress makes you fat!!!

i have lost 14 pounds. the day of the 15th pound was a fluke b/c i had thrown up all  night the night before… damn. so for my dream weight i have 10 more pounds. if i lose those 10 pounds husband will pay for me to get dive certified… which i was planning on doing at some point anyways… but he wants to do it while i’m down in florida… ((so i have limited time to lose those ten pounds!!!))

tonight i think i’m going to make my eggplant parmesan again… b/c it was SO freaking good last night… i will probably tinker with the recipe a little bit and add more flavor… but, that sounds like a plan!!! yay!!

there were a couple other things i wanted to rant about, but i don’t remember them. of course. oh well!!!

If you enjoy living, it is not difficult to keep the sense of wonder.
Ray Bradbury
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